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24th-Oct-2016 08:59 pm(no subject)
8th-Oct-2016 09:02 pm(no subject)
#sonya6000 #testing
7th-Jun-2016 09:02 pm(no subject)

Today is a day to celebrate.

I awoke, opened my eyes, I was not sick, or dead, I was alive.

I heard the garbage truck collecting garbage, heard the compactor grinding away, at 5am.

The men in those trucks had been up much earlier than me.

I had coffee, boiled in the pot like my Amerindian grandfather, drained the black water into my cup, savoured the dregs, with the bitter grains

I did not stand still, staring, lost in myself for hours.

I did not stand still, afraid to cross the threshold of my door.

I made my bed, very carefully, tight and smooth like a hospital bed

brushed teeth and wore clean shirt and trousers

applied makeup, even a cat-eye, and was very meticulous.

I left my house, checked the appliances. The weather was fine, air was fresh

Arrived at work, began to work

spoke to colleagues

performed impeccably for the next 9 hours.

Today was a success.

2nd-Dec-2015 10:21 pm - The birds (for Syria)

here they soar, unaware of their soaring
corbeaux, black dots on blue
frames aloft and straining

down below, on a hot dusty street in Port of Spain, I watch them,
but hardly anyone looks up.
Blackbirds, the bane of bodies of workers that walk along Maraval Road for their hot lunches
hardly anyone looks up.

Somewhere in another hot dusty place
different birds will fly,
they will be terrible and merciless
somewhere else
they will look up,
and watch the gifts of death as they fall

and cry out
why?

22nd-Oct-2015 07:41 pm - Cloud people

They sway and hum
and go and come
their legs are droplets
in the sun
their fluffy heads
are so serene
Cloud people
are so wise,
it seems.

The young ones
are like cotton balls
but they grow big
and grey and tall.

They wander 'round
the island free
helping out
where need be.

Bless you, friends.
Cloud people know
that where rain falls
love will grow.

7th-Oct-2015 05:00 am(no subject)
6th-Oct-2015 08:19 pm(no subject)
PhotosCollapse )
21st-Sep-2015 09:07 pm - Blue

Lake blue, sky blue

azure tropical blue,

indigo, turquoise, cobalt, lapis

granny's old blue soap

Blue, Blue, I Love You.

Blue the child's lunchbox
and blue her pinafore,
blue her favourite crayon,
and blue the old school door.

Blue the sky when all turns to darkness
and just before dawn.

the colour of pain and fear the colour of storms

the colour of wonder,
the colour of chance.
of joyful sadness.

28th-May-2015 09:07 pm(no subject)
19th-Apr-2015 11:07 pm(no subject)

into this space
you write your sadness
and set it free

20th-Mar-2015 10:52 am(no subject)

Eclipse, thunderous spirit howling. A charged electric nature to seeing. Within, a quiet thrumming.  My birthday is April 4th.  Damian's also.  There is an eclipse on that day I think.

I feel powerful, from observing my body I have slipped into it, aware of my suit, my willing servant. Striding  forward together, into the sun.

Something makes me swivel to look up at the sky all the time.  Last night to see stars and fireflies, this morning to see clouds like tiny puffy creatures, singing with the sound the wind makes, wild happy creatures.  Like me.

11th-Mar-2015 06:07 am - Crystals

I am collecting stones.  My friend Melissa puts them in her bra.  She's a tv journo, and my yoga buddy.  We have agreed that even if it is a placebo, the end result is the same.  During the full moon I clambered onto the roof and left them under moonlight.  I am now half-crazy just like my mother.

The lapis is working, I am writing.  Citrine is working, I have gotten a new job offer that pays more.  Of course I don't credit stones for these things but they focus me, they are my talismans.  I still get angry, still feel grumpy sometimes, but my depression has lessened.  I sit sometimes and bask in my solitude, here in this green warm valley with blue skies.

Thr first night I slept with the clear quartz I dreamed it was pointed at my third eye and there was a sharp, piercing sound, high-pitched, verging on uncomfortable. 

I am going to ny in May, my sister is graduating.  I miss her, haven't seen her in 2 years.  This year is for growing, I am rested and feel a driven energy, steady and relentless. Something that lay fallow is rising, not forced, it is the thing I was waiting for.

21st-Jan-2015 08:06 pm(no subject)

the earth didn't turn
stars stuck watching as
everything stopped
on kelly kenny street granny sat and smiled
with nothing inside
the step father sits with his wife
asks for my presence at his daughter's
graduation
i am polite
i leave
things turn
i turn the way
a weather vane spins
mindlessly.

21st-Nov-2014 06:05 am(no subject)
Went to a counselling session and she said I should write it out. I'm journaling again. It's strange and awkward.


2014-11-21 06.00.56 1
10th-Nov-2014 09:00 pm - Caramel Bundt Cake
Set oven to 350F
mix eggs, cinnamon, milk
as for the sugar:
"Cast it into the fire!"
She said in her Elven Voice
stirring it with butter
rendering life into sweet
caramel dreams.

The clock ticks-changes digitally-
forward to the unveiling.
She rudely peeks past the oven door.
Lying nestled
in the fires of Mount Doom
is a perfect ring,
her Caramel Bundt Cake.

All manner of prayers baked in:
that life be sometimes fluffy and sweet,
something sticky delirious
some sweet true taste,
fleeting and wondrous.


She slices through.
'Ohmmmm,' she hums.
7th-Nov-2014 10:49 am - let's live suddenly without thinking
let’s live suddenly without thinking

under honest trees,
a stream
does.the brain of cleverly-crinkling
-water pursues the angry dream
of the shore. By midnight,
a moon
scratches the skin of the organised hills

an edged nothing begins to prune

let’s live like the light that kills
and let’s as silence,
because Whirl’s after all:
(after me)love,and after you.
I occasionally feel vague how
vague idon’t know tenuous Now-
spears and The Then-arrows making do
our mouths something red,something tall

- ee cummings
30th-Oct-2014 12:13 pm - morning vinyasa
26th-Aug-2014 06:49 pm - rootless


Someone posted up on Facebook that once you've lived somewhere else, a part of you will be left behind there.  The root breaks off a piece when it's uprooted.  The changes here are unmistakeable; our Independence celebrations consist of a shabby parade and sad dingy pennants hanging from a few government buildings.  But I don't mourn the way we have advanced tchnologically.  But it as if we have lost the tree and root of us.  Our green spaces littered with plastic bottles and frantic noisy cars.  We live on a tiny island; where are you trying to go?  Someone rams their black sports car drunkenly into a fire hydrant.  Mindlessness.

I see a picture of my former English Lit. professor, now a member of the government advisor commitee for policy and constitutional change.  She is sitting in a metal foldout chair.  Her dreadlocks are now greying, she is as thin as ever.  Looming above her are a rows of policemen in navy, with riot shields and batons.  They speak down to her; this woman who has written books that cement our literary history, this woman who has helped to create a Caribbean literary canon.  She sits quietly, calmly.  The movement of brute force upon our history.  I don't even know what I am writing now, I just remember sitting in her classes, quietly receiving her light.

Years from now we will stop and ask each other, "Where were you when it happened?  When we lost control?  When villains found out that the way to subdue us was not through brute force but with stealth, education, playing games with our laws, they have won before we even knew what we were fighting for.  Right now the Senate will pass a bill that makes it virtually impossible for us to escape the bipartisan curse of our nation?  We will be divided into races, we will see groups hate each other without knowing exactly why they hate each other.  Or maybe we see past it.  We cannot be so stupid?  Can we?

I want to create an ending to this but I consider the way we create our existence day by day.  We have no long history.  Our nation is 52 years old.  We have oil, and we have natural gas. We are fortunate.  Now we are beset by people smarter than us.  Our people are helpless, like the Amerindians when the Spanish first set upon them, giving and open, believing them genuine while they hold the weapons behind their backs.

And the parties continue, mad, insane revels, drunken mindless baths.  They crash on the way home, they murder each other.  My God. Was it always this way? I'm exhausted now.  The thing that screams to me the most is the silence, our communal, anguished silence.

21st-Jul-2014 09:28 am - summer of light


"All your life you wait, and then it finally comes, and are you ready?

Open your eyes, the French man on the radio used to say, and see what you can with them before they close forever."

-Anthony Doerr, "All the Light We Cannot See"
17th-Jun-2014 03:09 pm - Girls. by Takagi Masakatsu


Being a girl, at 7, playing. 
22nd-May-2014 10:13 pm - island rhapsody
the night scarred and pitted with streetlights
the people are unhappy
the city dump on the outskirts of town
burns
the minister was found in a video
snorting coke with prostitutes
the parties continue to ooze.

Once a vagrant stood outside the old
Red House, our former house of Parliament
ranting wildly,
threw bricks and smashed
the old windows
the old carcass of our soul
left empty and broken
while sirens howl and snarl.

The smiles stretch just a bit too far
cackling rings out in the darkness
children kick empty cans in the street
stare at you and hiss

the moon at night a silver beacon
so far, so far
the dogs bark and cry
we wake in the dark hours
toss and turn in the heat
and shiver.
9th-Apr-2014 03:24 pm - The Marvelous Women ~ Mohja Kahf
Originally posted by bleodswean at The Marvelous Women ~ Mohja Kahf
All women speak two languages:
the language of men
and the language of silent suffering.
Some women speak a third,
the language of queens.
They are marvelous
and they are my friends.

Read more...Collapse )
5th-Jan-2014 12:29 am - On using a new app for writing

This is a test.  This is a test.
The orange coat is big for Spring
a volcano in Indonesia has just erupted
magazines tell you how to get fit,
have sex
and eat healthy
for the New Year.
My family is quiet
grandma is covered under sheets
Parkinson's has tied her mouth shut
she talks and I cannot understand
but she knows my name
"Maria", she whispers.
She never complains.
The rain fell in warm golden sheets
against a backdrop of sun today
I prayed to the gods of rain
sun and love
Sometimes under the cover of
moon I listen
for the Voice to speak
it is in me
waiting.
4th-Jan-2014 07:52 pm - Pigeon Point Jetty
Lying prone against the jetty
it is clean, weathered grey.
Peek down between planks
at a myriad of fish
waving waves of silver.


and the sun hot and yellow
and the water aqua and clear
and the wind a soft exhalation

I meet my Self at the place where
sea meets sky


we travel onward
in one place
neverending.
10th-Dec-2013 04:05 pm(no subject)


Stat sua cuique dies
Stat sua cuique dies
Mæl is me to feran
A meto maneat nostros
A meto maneat nostros
C'est pour cela que je suis née
Kono michi ya
Yuku hito nashi ni
Kono michi ya
Aki no kure
C'est pour cela que je suis née
Ne me plaignez pas
C'est pour cela que je suis née


To each his day is given (Latin, Aeneid)
To each his day is given (Latin, Aeneid)
'Tis time that I fare from you (Old English, Beowulf)
I gain from our time here (Latin, Aeneid)
I gain from our time here (Latin, Aeneid)
I was born for this (French, Joan of Arc)
On this road (Japanese, Matsuo Bashô haiku)
Where nobody else travels (Japanese, Matsuo Bashô haiku)
On this road (Japanese, Matsuo Bashô haiku)
Autumn Nightfall (Japanese, Matsuo Bashô haiku)
I was born for this (French, Joan of Arc)
Do not pity me (French, Joan of Arc)
I was born for this (French, Joan of Arc)
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